Submission?

Wow I just realized that I can back up what Russell Moore says in that SBC article (that many evangelicals are “unwittingly” living as feminists) with some research I did last year for an anthropology class. I wanted to look at the actual attitudes of conservative evangelical married women regarding submission. Sure, the stated belief is that they should submit to their husbands, but what REALLY goes on? What I found out is identical to what Russell Moore says in the article.

The SBC article noted with alarm that, in practice, evangelicals are gettin' soft on their complementarian views. I think it’s safe to say that many conservative evangelical women don’t really and truly hold to complementarian views. The idea in many of the studies was that these women “negotiate” these views within their marriages. According to some studies, complexities and contradictions abound, and apparently, religious teachings lack power when it comes to practical application. Although complementarians strongly uphold that women should be submissive, a look at the application of these beliefs may reveal the contrary. So there’s a discrepancy between doctrine and day-to-day living. The complementarians promote a “traditional” view of family, namely a patriarchal model in which a wife submits to her husband. Also, it seems preferable that the wife/mother should stay at home and raise the children. Studies have looked at the extent to which traditional Christian views of gender roles influence a hegemonic idea of masculinity. Sole male leadership within a marriage has moved to take on a more SYMBOLIC role, while pragmatically, egalitarianism is the norm in many Christian marriages.

It seems that women have negotiated their place in marriage in the midst of seemingly oppressive belief systems. Christian traditionalists use rhetoric as a tool. In one study, women stress the fact that they want to submit to husbands of their own free will. In addition, weakness in MEN, rather than weakness in women, was the main reason given for choosing to submit to their husbands. Women in the traditionalist camp also emphasize that they and their husbands make family deci­sions with a great deal of compromise, cooperation, and discus­sion. From the studies, it seems that women are using their beliefs in creative and even subversive ways when they live them out in everyday, practical life.

Comments

[Todd]

hello nat, glad you are weighing in on this one. here is the link to the full paper moore offers (http://www.henryinstitute.org/documents/2005ETS.pdf). i wonder if you would have seen any of the sources he uses. this is the second paper this week i have read that makes me queasy at the scholarship offered as "conservative."

[Nicole]

I was speaking with a wife who supports complementarian views yesterday, and even she was admitting that if you want women follow that lifestyle, then women couldn't be the primary parent.

See, if you want the wife to be submissive, but then put so much running of the household and managing the children into her hands, then she's by default in a position to make multiple decisions everyday that are leadership decisions.

I don't agree with her complementarian stance, but at least she was able to see that being complementarian doesn't work without drastic changes in the way churches view things.

(And I don't like the implications of those changes, and nature shows that those aren't good changes. Children naturally make the mother the primary parent, even if she isn't the primary caregiver.)

[Natalie]

Todd,
Thanks for the link to Moore's paper...it was good to see him flesh out his argument a little more. I've actually read a really good article co-written by Gallagher and Smith, which is a good, um, complement (couldn't resist!) to Moore's. They attribute the changing views within evangelicalism to the economic changes that the US has experienced in the past century. It's pretty interesting, and I have it in PDF if you want to read it.

Nicole,
Good point! It is such a paradox to insist that, in all cases, fathers rather than mothers should be the spiritual leaders of the family, when a lot of times mothers are in more of a position to influence their children.

[ding]

fascinating! thanks for the link and i can't wait to read the paper. having come from a very conservative church i have often thought there's many a slip between doctrine and practice in many conservative marriages. (my parents' relationship being one of those.)

[amy]

great blog....i found you on a common n.t. wright link and really enjoy your thoughts. i went to seminary for 2 years and my best friend is in seminary now...can't wait to check out the "bridget jones goes to seminary" blog